Hello, fellow human. We are searching for a new human to join our team of perfectly normal humans who create internet websites for other humans. Please note, this is in no way a trap.
The specific human we are searching for is of the classification “front-end developer,” and carries the sub-classifications “WordPress developer” and “Earth land mammal.” All physical variations are welcome. (Be aware that we no longer accept infants. They create problems in the machine.)
Each day, when you arise from your necessary human slumber and engage your primitive human computer, you may be asked to do the following:
As fellow humans, we understand the value of presenting a series of related data points in list form. Please regard the following “list of technical skills and professional traits” that we desire in a suitable specimen.
What We Are
We are a digital agency comprising regular humans, who are composed of the biological matter that is typical to our species.
In exchange for your labor, we will provide you with the following valuable offerings: A competitive salary, a flexible work schedule, regular cranial measurement, 401k matching, medical benefits, and many Earth holidays.
If you wish to be considered for this position, please transmit a message to [email protected] and use the subject line “Suitable Specimen” so we may locate your communication. Include your resume, links to your work, and do not alert the authorities. This is simply a very normal job posting that we have typed with our puny human fingers.
At this time, we are only accepting applicants from continents on the planet Earth.
End transmission.